Archive for December 2007
Cap Update and Branch Orioleans/Temple Ravenians
21. December 2007 by Orioles Fanatic.
I ran the idea of buying the canvas Os cap with the pink O by a couple friends of mine, the only two people in the entire state of North Carolina I can talk to about these things. It was important to me to get a second opinion before I made a big mistake. They confirmed my long-held position that caps not in the team colors are reserved for frou frou gals who only wear team caps because their husband talked them into it. These are often the same people who don’t know how many outs are in an inning or why it’s a VERY BAD idea to trade Bedard. I even explained my rationalization, that I’d be making a political statement and they still said, “no.” Even if I wore my Cooperstown t-shirt and accompanying hip flask? Still “no.” They insisted I wasn’t the kind of person to wear a pink O and it would definitely send the wrong message.
I was further informed that I wouldn’t be allowed back into the state of Maryland, nor west of Tennessee, nor into Georgia, nor as far south as Florida, though on that last point, I must disagree. At Spring Training back when I lived in Tampa, my friends from Balto and I were the only ones making any noise at the games. It was akin to being at a golf match. The quiet did allow us to get Frank Robinson’s attention and when he turned to wave at us we were tickled senseless, for about the next 125 hours. Ah, such fond memories of the good old days.
I’m not going to lie. I was a little disappointed about the hat. I’ve become quite enamored with it. Why couldn’t the O be in orange? I have to get a grip on how easily I am seduced by all things pink. That was a close call.
Anyway, in the end I can’t wear a pink O. I couldn’t bear to be shown up again like I was a couple of years ago in Atlanta. My husband and I had gone to see the Orioles play the Braves. In a stadium full of people, sitting next to me was a woman who had her face painted orange and white. “Who is this trying to be a better fan than I?” I queried to myself. In a stadium full of people in Atlanta, I was sitting next to someone who works for the Cal Ripken Foundation! Though I don’t generally believe that things happen for a reason, in this particular instance, I wonder if God was saying, “You need to go save the Os.” Or maybe it was just God taunting me, as usual. I bet she had never heard of the Orioles for the first twenty years of her life and now she works side by side with one of my heroes. (Yes, I will be telling that story over and over again for the next 125 years.)
Whatever.
At any rate, I’ve warmed up to the knit cap after hearing that it proves, “I am down and dirty.”
Anyway, who the hell cares. It’s 2 pm and the managers have released us from our cubicle prisons and told us to go home, so I’ll leave you to contemplate the merits and fashion of one cap over another. You should also or perhaps instead, read this article sent by my friend, hapless victim of the Ravens, Mindpinball. If you’re from our fair city, you’ll feel less alone in your suffering.
Oh yeah. One more thing. ESPN made a list of worst sports years ever. I don’t know how we didn’t make the list. I’m beginning to think that the Baltimore sports teams are a new division of the People’s Temple or Branch Davidians. Don’t the Branch Orioleans know that fewer fans will cut into their profits?
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Orioles cap makes political statement
20. December 2007 by Orioles Fanatic.
The Orioles are always tempting me with discount offers. I struggle to resist. I really want that blanket and I can see where the flask will come in handy. However, today I browsed through the website and saw a cap I like. Now normally, even though pink is my favorite color, I’m opposed to baseball caps that aren’t strictly in the team colors. It’s wrong, morally so, in my opinion.
However, this cap seems to make a political statement. It’s wrong on three counts:
1) It’s not in Orioles colors (though it is pretty).
2) It’s grammatically incorrect. Here’s something I would like to shout to the world, “THERE IS NO APOSTROPHE in ‘Os.’” (I would also like to teach programmers the appropriate use of the single and double quotation mark and have permission to taser them every time they use a single where a double quotation applies — which is nearly always.)
3) It’s ripped. At first I thought it was a mistake, but I’ve been informed that this is the style. Duh!
I struggled to discern the statement the cap is making and then it hit me. Of course, it’s that things with the Orioles are all messed up.
I have now successfully rationalized buying and wearing an Orioles cap in the wrong colors. I’ll just have to make sure that if I wear it, I also wear my Cooperstown “I was there” t-shirt so that no one mistakes me for a pretend, sissy fan, who doesn’t even know the rules of the game.
Which reminds me, if I were president, I’d have a law about only real fans wearing caps. I hate it when I see someone in a baseball cap and when I try to talk game with them, they turn out to be from the far reaches of a remote, dusty town in Slovenia and don’t even know what baseball is. I feel like such a fool. Then my husband laughs, as if to say, “Why would you think anyone besides you cares about baseball.” It hurts, because it’s so true.
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Haiku for Mindpinball
18. December 2007 by Orioles Fanatic.
My poor friend Mindpinball deserves better than the NFL gives him, so as a way of showing that I care and I’m on his side, I’ve composed a few poems in his honor.
Their skill is not relevant.
To make weekly picks
Grasshopper, use their colors.
Ravens, you are a bad team
Mindpinball picked you,
You know you should win, don’t you?
Pick by favorite color,
Then favorite place,
Next week, reverse the order.
Enchanting Sunshine sends a virtual hug to Mindpinball and all the other Ravens fans, and for that matter all the Orioles fans, too.
P.S. Both my husband and I apologize for laughing when we heard you picked the Dolphins. It was a laugh of sympathy. Our luck is very similar.
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Oriole (Mitchell) Report
13. December 2007 by Orioles Fanatic.
So about that Mitchell Report. Yeah…Um…Trying to think of how to change the subject. Okay. Let’s get it over with. Here’s the link if you want to read it for yourself. It’s only 400 pages, but they’re double-spaced.
Here’s how to read it. Skip to about page 200 where the list of named players starts. (There’s some early stuff with Segui all over it.) Then scroll through the names. Every time you see a player who was on the Ys, you say, “Cheater! Cheater Ys!” and when you see a player on the Orioles, hit your down arrow key rapidly and pretend like it didn’t happen. Unfortunately, you’ll find a little repetitive stress injury in your down arrow finger.
Roch provides a list if you prefer to not hurt yourself. Physically anyway. In the words of my friend Jeff, “Segui appears to have been a cancer for your team.” Indeed he seems to have been a pusher. I think what’s even more tragic is I found myself wondering, “So if so many were doping, why the hell weren’t they doing better?” I haven’t followed the Orioles much in recent years - I had no MASN. Dark cold years they were. So maybe the Os were great and I missed it. Or I’ve been blacked out for a long time.
I have to say my greatest disappointment is that more cheater Ys weren’t named. It would have been such a comfort and I was not just hoping, but expecting to see the whole team implicated. Instead, half the names are Os and for what? It’s like every day they look for a new way to hurt me.
Oh well. Hopefully the MLB will start to address this problem now. Regardless, I’m not giving up my right to call the Ys cheaters. (If only Jeter had been on the list!! Cheater, cheater, Derek Jeter!!)
No, I never have grown up.
—–Later that evening—————
A comment from Roch’s blog:
Are we ever going to hear any good news from the Orioles again?
Every year we seem to trade our talent for mediocre players … how many years now have we been told the Orioles are rebuilding? To top it off Mr. Angelos seems either not inclined or not able to spend on top notch quality free agents - which has made many fans question his committment to fielding a quality team as opposed to just making money. He is widely seen throughout baseball as another meddling George Steinbrenner and the Orioles have become an irrelevant laughing stock of baseball with little chance of being competitive, a weak farm system and little to offer even in the way of trades. A far cry from the glory days of the team or even the years with Cal Ripkin when we were held in high regard.
What has gone so wrong for so long? Truth be told NO ONE I know can see a competitive team in the future nor any strong pitchers or position players (that we don’t trade). How can you build a quality team if you let all your top talent leave? Like many fans I have been a season ticket holder for years and have grown up an Orioles fan - but am completely frustrated with the direction of the franchise.
Now to top it off revelations from the Mitchell Report have revealed many Orioles players used performance enhancing drugs. Yet another black mark for a team in disarray. So I ask again are we ever going to have a competetive team with good news? All i can say is clean house, get your act together, get a clear game plan, build, acquire AND RETAIN talent and show the fans that you care and that the team and owner are making a serious effort and working in a positive direction.
Posted by: Karl S. | December 13, 2007 5:32 PM
Here! Here!
Posted in Ills of All Sorts, Off-Season/Boredom | Print | No Comments »
Patriot Defeat. Terribly Sad.
3. December 2007 by Orioles Fanatic.
Here’s the post I prepared and was ready to publish about seven minutes before the end of the game:
An adaptation…
“Be that word, we lost, our sign of parting!” I shrieked, upstarting–
“Get thee back into the tempest and the Chesapeake Bay shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my undefeated record unbroken! — quit the bust above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!”
Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid Patriots bust just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon’s that is dreaming.
And the lamplight o’er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And the Patriots soul from out that shadow that lies writhing painfully, defeated on the floor
Shall be lifted—nevermore!Aw, too bad Patriots.
I’m a convert. I “tuned in” accidentally because the game was on at the gym. Of course, I had to finish watching it.
Congrats MP, cause I just know you took our team and not the Patriots. At least that’s one game!
Wow. Heart-breaking.
Heart.
Breaking.
The dude caught the ball at the 2 yard line and no time left.
I think I’ll stick with baseball. One Baltimore team is all this girl can handle. Can’t Baltimore catch a break somewhere? Anywhere? Why did I get my hopes up? Is this part of some grand scheme to leave all of Baltimore feeling utterly hopeless and dejected? Are the sports teams in with the pharmaceutical companies? Someone is getting a spiff from the number of prescriptions filled for Prozac.
The band Boston used to be one of my favorites, but I don’t even think I can listen to them anymore. I’m off Sam Adams too. Maybe even the Car Talk guys. No, nevermind. It’s not their fault.
Sorry MP. I was pulling for you and the rest of my fair city.
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